Huff Po Chicago - After spending most of his adult life behind bars, 73-year-old Walter Unbehaun decided to rob another bank in hopes of getting caught. He felt more comfortable in prison, court documents allege, and wanted to spend his final years there. So the balding, gray-haired South Carolina man leaned on a cane as he walked into a bank in suburban Chicago over the weekend and used a novel stickup line: He had just six months to live, so he had nothing left to lose, according to a federal complaint citing his post-arrest interrogation. Unbehaun also allegedly lifted his coat to show a teller a silver revolver shoved into his waistband. Investigators say Unbehaun, of Rock Hill, S.C., walked out of the Harris Bank in Niles on Saturday with $4,178 in his pockets. He wore no disguises, so law enforcement quickly tracked him down using surveillance-camera photos of him holding up the bank, the complaint said.
Brooks was here baby! Walter Unbehaun doing it big in the free world sticking up banks, going back to jail and loving every minute of it. Always wondered why Brooks never did that in Shawshank. Like once he got out life sucked but he never did anything about it. Just walked around almost getting decapitated by cars, double-bagged groceries and fed pigeons. What the fuck kinda free life is that bro? Your store manager boss is a prick, why don’t you stab him a few times in the abdomen and go back to jail with all your friends and tar roofs and shit? It’s not like the place burned to the ground and you’re the only one that got away. Its still there. If you’re so mopey just commit another felony and go back you pussy. At least this Walter Unbehaun guy didn’t live out his days stuck in the hell that is the modern world. Bro got out of that game and retired off to prison paradise like a boss. We should all be so lucky.