“And I see the most beautiful girl I ever met, and not because of her physical beauty” Yeah no shit bro!

This whole saga isn’t even a day old and it’s just getting more confusing. When news drops there’s that instant scramble to Twitter, ESPN and live press conferences that kind of engulfs you. You consume every part of the story like a little naive fat kid at a buffet without realizing what it is you’re ingesting. Is this kid really that fucking stupid? How does he try to pull this off without even knowing what she looks like? Does this affect his ability as a football player? As a leader? Will he ever be fully accepted in an NFL locker room? Clearly the dude’s gay right? How could the major networks be so lazy that they never sniffed this story until it was released? And now just like that kid at the buffet sitting on the john while his asshole explodes we’re looking at all the carnage and it’s fucking surreal.

It’s pretty obvious he and the University are going to stick to the Catfish excuse. Okay, but there’s two glaring holes there that will ultimately come right back around and hurt him: a) Dude is lying through his fucking teeth. Numerous times he talked about meeting this broad at Stanford, how pretty she is, all the phone conversations they had, and a bunch of other shit that isn’t anywhere close to being resolved. And b) Being that big of a fucking idiot obviously has to affect your pro potential.

I mean a huge part of what makes Te’o so attractive is his leadership potential. That dude WAS Notre Dame. He’s the dude whose supposed to step in and make you better through presence alone. Well how does a 21 year old kid surrounded by this scandal step into an NFL locker room and get respect? What if he drops to Pittsburgh at 17 and finds himself arguing with accused Bay Harbor Butcher James Harrison about assignments? Yeah good fucking luck with that dude. There’s literally nobody in the league that’s going to take shit from Manti Te’o. Dude is going to get ridiculed up and down for years.

At least when Ray Lewis murdered that dude it helped his on-field presence. “I kill people” is a lot more intimidating than “I masturbated to the fake imagery of my fake girlfriend for 3 years”. Te’o's shit is downright humiliating. He’s already the laughing stock of the NFL and he hasn’t even been fucking drafted yet. We’ll see how he recovers but he definitely won’t be able to just ignore it. There’s just far too much to answer for. Can’t wait to see what happens.

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