MFK – World Series WAG’s
Kate Upton
Nicole Vogelsong
Amber Zito
The obvious wild card here is Nicole Vogelsong. Lots of Stoolies love her. Seems like a down home bitch who can make you laugh or chill or fuck your brains out. Rides and dies with Ryan Vogelsong harder than any chick I’ve ever seen in my life. All great attributes.
But as great as she seems when she’s getting champagne cum blasted in the clubhouse and whooping it up in the stands cracking jokes, if you saw her for one minute on The Franchise you know this is an instant kill. Instant. I’m talking head shot from the woods and you walk up and put one more in the brain for good measure. Bitch doesn’t know how to shut up for the life of her. Can’t handle that for the rest of your life, one night, one minute, none of it. Sorry babe, you’re fucking dead.
Which brings us to a repeat of last night’s Zito vs Verlander showdown. Honestly I think the decision’s easy. Kate Upton is my ideal woman and you can’t marry your ideal woman. Can’t wake up one day and see Kate Upton eating a cinnabon at 8:30 in the morning with saggy tits and a double chin laughing about how she never used that stair-master I bought her 4 years ago. Can’t do it. I’d rather take my chances chillaxing with Cali girl and bonafide all-world smokebomber Amber Zito for the rest of my life and when things grow stale with her I’ll lock myself in the bathroom and masturbate to the images ingrained in my brain of the 45 seconds I had fucking Kate or killing Nicole and die a happy man.
Marry - Amber Zito
Fuck – Kate Upton
Kill - Nicole Vogelsong
PS – Last night Big Cat literally tried to convince me he invented “chillax” in 2001. Dead serious he thought he came up with it.
I believe Big Cat invented “chillax” more than I believe you’ve ever had sex with a human woman.
If anybody invented the world chillax it would be BigCat, you just don’t believe it because the chemo affected your ability to think
I’m pretty ashamed to say we had the same picks.
He tried to convince you, because he (like EVERYONE here) thinks you’re a fucking retard.
B- .. keep it up, you’re overachieving
such a hard blog to write when you’re not attracted to females.
I need to know the story on how big cat thinks he invented a word
total hardo move neil!!
i wanna see neil write a blog and submit it under someone else’s name to see the comment section. i bet if this blog had someone elses name attached it wouldnt be getting as much hate, pretty good stuff here.
45 seconds seems REALLY generous neil
At the last minute Neil realized he used the word chillax so he had to invent some story about big cat so we wouldn’t think he’s a horrible person for combining the words chilling and relaxing to describe anything but the inner reaches of my butthole.
Neil didn’t vote because the options here were all women. FU Kneel.
neil you are a fucking joke
What the fuck is the point of voting if you don’t show the results? Fuck you Neil
this is a very good blog. Totally on point. Fuck the haters
pretty sure you can always get divorced if/when she gets fat. pretty much a no brainer for upton.
solid blog – B
Neil do you find it hard to hide the fact that you’re gay?
http://www.ipetitions.com/petition/fire-neil-from-barstool
Do it! Sign the Petition to Fire Neil from Barstool!
not gonna lie schneebly this was funny as fuck.
We need a motorboat option.