SourceThe list of things not to do when you’re intoxicated is a long one, starting with “Drive a car” and “Draw a penis on someone’s face,” but “Hang from power lines” has to make the top five. A reportedly drunk man in China somehow escaped injury after climbing a power pole and making his way onto the cables, hanging there for more than 15 minutes. The man — who later told firefighters he’d been “in a bad mood” — drew a crowd, which gasped and shouted as he fell onto a second set of wires, eventually dropping unhurt onto an inflatable cushion. Medical staffers said his only injury was “the excessive alcohol in his body.”


Living in China officially makes people lose their goddamn minds. Every facet of their society is full of people who take ordinary tasks and just butcher them beyond all comprehension. Like forget about the guy who had a few drinks at the bar and 2 hours later was blackout drunk dangling from power lines, how about the guy who went up there after him? Dude what the fuck is wrong with you? You gonna carry him down or something? Just throw 110 lbs of dead-weight Chinaman on your back and scale back down a telephone pole? Maybe crescent kick him in the face and hope he falls and doesn’t snap a wire and electrocute you like you’re Cyrus in Con Air? Hey here’s an idea, how about you get a tranquilizer gun, shoot Mr. Miyagi in the face, let him drop and hope he doesn’t knock out your cable connection for too long. Anything else is just wasted energy.