Chicagoist - Living Social is selling tickets for the “Dennis Rodman Viewing Party Experience” for a chance to watch the Bulls on TV at a sports bar in the West Loop with The Worm himself. For $59 ($120 value), you get two drink tickets, a photo opportunity with Rodman, a raffle ticket for a signed jersey, entry into the costume contest and a halftime Q&A. Not enough Rodman for you? You can go VIP. For $129 ($250 value), you also get a 16×20 autographed photo and open bar. Living Social writes: In addition to announcing the fan costume winner at halftime, you’ll also get the chance to ask Rodman any unanswered questions about his time on and off the court and take a photo with him. After all, watching a game alongside Dennis Rodman certainly warrants some bragging rights.

Just kidding of course it didn’t fucking sell out. I can’t think of a worse dude to chill and watch a basketball game on the entire planet than Dennis Rodman. Maybe like an Indian foreign exchange student who won’t stop asking you about the rules and packs his own food and smells like a decomposing hooker body marinating in chili powder and rice vinegar. That might be worse. But right behind that is somebody who looks like this:

I don’t care if you’re one of the best rebounders in league history. Don’t care how many chips you won with the Bulls or how you used to put your penis inside Carmen Electra. The second you start cross-dressing as an exotic African RuPual tiger, I’m out.