If You Use A Case On Your Cell Phone You’re A Loser Plain And Simple
So on yesterday’s GTA I made a comment about how Miranda Kerr doesn’t use a case for her IPhone and how that turned me on because I do the same thing. Well much to my surprise people actually thought that was crazy. And I’m not going to lie, I expected far more out of the Stoolies. I expect women and old people to do this but men from 18-35 should never under any circumstance use a case on their phone.
You think Steve Jobs made the Iphone for someone to put a case on it? You think I want to cover up that cool chrome/metallic look? You think I want to hide the reflective apple? You think I want everyone to think I own a nokia or a samsung like some gross poor person? Fuck no. I need to feel my phone. Skin on metal. When I drop my phone I want it to hurt. That split second when your phone slips out of your hand and you know there is nothing you can do about it? That’s the most exhilarating moment in my life. Its like putting a bet down on the roulette wheel waiting for the ball to drop. Pure, unadulterated, Adrenaline. Why would I give that up? If you had a choice to use a condom or not would you wrap up? What about if someone offered you a fork to eat a slice of pizza? Would you take it? Fuck no. Putting a case on your phone is subtraction by addition.
And I know people are going to say this is me being a hardo. That its the same line of thinking as not using a shopping cart, or being awesome at crossfit, but its not. This is about being a man and taking care of your possessions. About having consequences when you fuck up. You think its a coincidence that every single girl on planet earth uses a cell phone case? Its chick mentality. Whoops my phone slipped. Oh my god I dropped my phone, how silly! I left my phone in a cab for the 2,382th time last night LOL. Fuck that. My phone and I have an intimate relationship. You know that kid in college who was clearly fed everything on a silver spoon growing up? Scared of minorities. No life experience. Never changed a flat tire. Soft baby hands. That’s what a phone that’s been in a case is like. Just a soft bitch. The world is a shitty place. Life sucks. Why have your phone think any different?
So go ahead and put a case on your phone, just know I’m judging you as a person. You’re weak and irresponsible. And that’s not just me talking, that’s the whole world.
PS
Barstool Cell phone case poll is as follows.
Cell Phone Case aka “The Big Vaginas”
-Mo
-Neil
-KFC
No Cell Phone Case aka “The Real Men” aka “The Bad 2 The Bone Crew”
-Pres
-Big Cat
-Feitelberg
-Kmarko
Vote 1 for “I’m a pussy and need to put a case on my phone” and 10 for “I would never use a case and would like to formally submit an application for membership in the exclusive Bad 2 The Bone Crew”
(1,862 votes, average: 5.32 out of 10)
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i would pay good money to be in that crew if BigCat designs a tshirt for us to wear
BigCat is the best thing to happen to BSS in a while.
Kight want to remove that BSS case poll though, having Pres and Feitelberg on your side isn’t helping.
All you Hardo’s at the Stool that dont use a cell phone case obviously have flip phones or 1st gen blackberry’s. Need to protect the iPhone 5 like a mofo.
what a fuckin idiot
A plus blog big cat, but I have to disagree, I’ve broken a million phones
cell phone cases are for faggots and poor people.
Phone case and Phone belt clip are not the same. Also, I want to be in the ‘Bad to the Bone Crew”
These arnt condoms we’re talking about. Cell phone covers make perfect sense.
Big Cat, you are a weird motherfucker. but i love it.
pres doesn’t count, he has a fucking blackberry. Iphone is a whole different story.
Do we have some leeway here like rubber case vs plastic or just straight up? Fuck it, I’m in the The Big Vagina crew. BVC4Life
During week: no case
Weekend: Otterbox blackout protection
settled
Anyone with an iPhone is a loser….Plain and simple.
BC youre retarded bro. I can understand not having a case if you have a blackberry, those things cost like 30 bucks to replace. No chance Im spending an extra 5 bills on a new iphone bc I dropped it one time.
Disagree Snap, i have the 5 and have no intention of ever getting a cover.
Forgot to mention the fact that the rubber covers make it nearly impossible to get your phone in or out of your pocket, which is fine if you’re a bitch and use a purse, but a man with normal, non-skinny jeans make it awkard as shit. A+ regardless.
PEOPLE THAT DO NOT USE CELL PHONE CASES:
1. JEWS
2. POOR PEOPLE
u either can’t afford one or your two jew-cheap to buy one….
This are just the facts pussycat.
Pres doesn’t use a case because putting a case on a blackberry is the equivalent of putting a case on a desktop with windows ’95.
well pres has a blackberry so buying a case would double the value of the phone
how about a clear case you moron. go bills, squish the fish
big cat, you’ve obviously never dealt with Verizon’s “insurance” or “warranties”… they are a joke. but I’ll bet you a brand new iphone 4s with a shattered screen that pres comes out with a starfish (or something gay) cellphone case now that you’ve made cell phone cases the flavor of the week.
Feitelberg and Kmarko DEFINITELY use cases for their phones. Those two are total weiners.
and yes ovbiouolsy the jews wont have a cell phone case unwanted expenses
instead of doing a 1-10 poll…how bout you make an actual survey where you click the bubble and get accurate results..just a thought
If I dispose of fietelburg, can I take his spot on the Bad 2 the Bone team? I’ll take care of kneel, too, if that helps my case.
If you spend $200 or more on a cell phone and don’t use a case because “it’s shiny” you’re an idiot. And yeah, Miranda Kerr doesn’t need a case because she’s like, you know, filthy rich.
i kid you not, i simply saw the title of this blog after i refreshed the superblog and immediately knew it was a big cat blog…. Big Cat/Joe Rogan 2016
5000% true. I have been laughing for years at the assholes who try to shove gigantic case-ridden phones in their pockets while mine just slinks on in the way God (steve jobs) meant it to.
I have been preaching this for years! The iPhone is sleek and sexy and an otter box or any other case completely trumps that. Take pride in being athletic enough to hold on to your phone. People flip out all the time because I dont have a case and it bugs the shit out of me. Mines perfect and Iv’e had iphones since they came out. Never broken one. I get why some people need them. Some of us don’t.
so, carrying around a beat to fuck iphone is a good look?
if an iphone impresses anyone you are hanging out with, they are fucking losers.
fucken idiots like u r the reason my apple stock is through the roof. score cat, u and ur beatup looking phone are cool as fuck.
Of course Steve Jobs didn’t want you to put a case on your phone, he knew you idiots would fucking break them and buy new ones.
I am going to buy a case today because there is no way in hell I would ever want to be associated with or in the same group with that little queer Feitelberg
am i the only one who thinks a $700 piece of technology is worth protecting, if not at least a little bit?
I use an apple bumper for this exact reason. Keeps the sleekness of the phone, but if you drop it you don’t have to worry about it
belt clip people are pussies. Cases for iPhones are mandatory…. they scratch and break so easily.
I never used a case on my previous iPhones but since I got the 5 which scratches when you place it on a fucking table I got a case for it. Suck it.
KFC should feel like a schmuck being in the same group as Mo and Neil… I thought KFC was better than that.
I had a case on one of my phones. for 2 days. It was like Parks and Recreation when they put a cage around the water fountain and Andy just tore it off. Exactly like that.
Yeah, the iPhone definitely looks better when it’s cracked and scratched all to shit. Come on, big cat.
i didnt even have to look at the list for 2 seconds before i knew which side KFC and neil would be on.
Pres and Feitelberg don’t have covers because they cost money and they’re Jewish.
Also, PRes has a Blackberry. They stopped making covers for those back in 2008, I believe.
i would rather pay $50 for an otterbox than pay $600 for a new iPhone.
So for the sake of reality we will call bad 2 the bone group…the fucking idiots group. What I would do as the obvious superior intelligence group…would wait for someone in the fucking idiot group to put their phone on their desk. Someone from the superior intelligence group would push me towards that persons desk….Their phone would go right in to a wall at relatively high speed. When the phone without a cover (for the sake of some how you reasoned this makes you more cool) breaks to shit I will say sorry man was fooling around didn’t know your phone was there and w/o a case, walk away laughing and enjoy my smoke break.
Honestly though like realistically using a case or not does not like honestly mean anything like realistically it doesnt big camel
aside from women, there is only one other exception as to who can use phone cases: Mexicans. Like blacks with diamond chains, its in their blood and soul to strut that case on their belt.
Kill all jews die Jew die
If you don’t use a case you have little woman hands. iPhone slips out of any normal sized man hands way too easily.
you are a fucking idiot, some people use a case because they are not sitting at a desk all day long playing with their joy stick. get off your ass and do something.
The two thousand three hundred and eighty two’th time I dropped my phone…that is when I bought a big vagina case. It even smells like vaginas and tastes like pennies!
Yeah because spider glass is such a cool look on a cell phone screen. You fucking suck, KFC.
What about a clear case? Best of both worlds.
Props to buckoff for the tip on Apple Bumper. Just copped an orange one. Go O’s!
I was getting really mad at this cuz i thought it was feitelberg writing this cuz hes a fuckin idiot. But now its kinda funny. Whatever big cat you fuckin weirdo
So writing a blog about having a case on your phone must make you a huge faggot right?
only phones that should have a case is droid, so it covers up the fact that your a suckr with no iphone, big cat is the top dog
when your blacked out 80% of the weekend, having a case on your phone really helps. ive cracked my iphone with a case on it 2 times, sure might as well not had a case. so now i dont. but what about this one? http://vimeo.com/50052571
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cell phone cases are for people who cant afford to buy new cell phones
Curious as to the median income for Stool regular commenters.. 45k?
It’s a iPhone not Iphone. Read a book!