I Hope Briggs Decapitates Jermichael Finley On Sunday
The war of words between the Chicago Bears and Green Bay Packers continued, as Lance Briggs called Jermichael Finley “an idiot” for suggesting the Bears will be better off without Brian Urlacher on Sunday. Brian Urlacher has seen his tackles per game decline each season since missing 15 games in 2009 with a wrist injury. “He’s an idiot,” Briggs said. “Just suit up and play ball. “His comments aren’t going to change the outcome of the game. They aren’t going to help him or anybody play better. It doesn’t really matter.” Finley told Fox Sports Wisconsin on Wednesday that Urlacher, 34, is slowing in his later years. Urlacher won’t play Sunday at Soldier Field, and he may miss the rest of the regular season with a hamstring injury.
“Urlacher is at the end of his career right now; he’s playing a little slow out there,” Finley said Wednesday. “I don’t think they’re losing too much if he’s out. Putting another guy in might help them a little.” Urlacher brushed off Finley’s comments during an appearance on SiriusXM NFL Radio on Thursday. “If he thinks that, that’s fine,” Urlacher said. “Just like a couple of years ago, I think, he tore his ACL and the Packers were actually better without him. You know, they won the Super Bowl. I hope we can duplicate that as well because it won’t hurt my feelings if we go on and win the Super Bowl without me like they did without him. People can say what they want. “It feels like I deal with something like this every year. Someone’s always saying something about me. It’s a revolving door every year.” A knee injury sidelined Finley for all but five games of their 2010 season which ended with a Super Bowl victory.
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First of all, I think saying “Not that I root for injuries but…” is my favorite thing to say. Because if we’re being perfectly honest with each other, yeah I want the entire Packers roster to be injured. I’m not talking paralysis, but torn ACL’s, broken arms, whatever, I don’t outright root for it, but when it happens I’m definitely not upset either. Nothing worse than the guy at the bar who goes on some holier than thou kick about how he doesn’t want his team to win unless its against the best. Shut the fuck up dude. If the Packers all got injured this afternoon and they had to trot out Green Bay High School I would give zero fucks. If you can’t admit that to yourself then you’re a lying sack of shit.
Second, and probably more importantly, is there a bigger shithead in the league than Jermichael Finley? I’m obviously speaking from a weak position right now because currently the Bears season is the toy car in Tommy Boy, this one.
So its not like I’m oozing with confidence and swagger about Sunday but fuck Jermichael Finley. No one likes him. Packers fans don’t like him. Bears fans don’t like him. Aaron Rodgers doesn’t like him. Anyone who has ever had him on Fantasy HATES him. All he does is drop passes and say stupid shit. Honestly, if he caught 80 balls and 15 touchdowns for the next 5 years straight his career would still be a quarter of what Urlacher’s is. Does he even realize that the Packers aren’t re-signing him and he most likely will go to Cleveland or Oakland and become completely and utterly irrelevant? He does realize that right? I mean maybe he does, maybe this was on purpose, maybe he realized that being the guy who got decapitated by Briggs is actually his only play here, at least then people will remember his name.
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PS
And before anyone says “You’d take Finley on the Bears”. Yes I know I would. But that’s not saying much when your current Tight End is Kellen Davis. That’s like dating Gilbert Grapes Mom and having someone tell you you would bang any chick under 2 bills. No shit sherlock. Tell me something I don’t know.


getting a tommy boy and a gilbert grape reference in the same post is the most impressive thing anyone has ever done on this site
I never understood the hype with this guy
Something you don’t know…
I seldom wear condoms..but when I do, I wear ribbed and turn them inside out for my own pleasure.
i’m onto you big cat…
If you can’t catch passes with Aaron Rodgers as your QB then you probably suck.
finley has loads of talent and makes a great play here or there, but yea everyone hates him guy has a bigger mouth than to, and not enough game to back it up. bears still suck though
Packers 28, Bears 10
My confidence is at zero for sunday.
Why did Finley’s mother have to go and fuck up a powerful name like, “Michael” by adding “Jer” to it? First mistake. Come Sunday, Jermichael’s going to get Jerraped, American History-X style.
billman, couldn’t agree more. every year there is so much hype around him and every year he just disappoints…
jermichael finley HE’S A BEAST!!!! wish nfl thursday pregame brought that back
Amazed you didn’t throw a Honey Boo Boo’s mom reference in there. You know, to compliment the Gilbert Grape one
The Bears haven’t beaten a good team this season. They are so fucked this weekend.
Bears still talking trash like its the ‘Super Bowl Shuffle’ era. Get over the fact that you’re a second tier team with a third tier QB…and Jim Mcmahon isn’t walking through those doors anythime soon. Cheeseheads by more than a couple TD’s.
I think the Bears are probably fucked this weekend, but they have a weird way of winning games when everyone thinks they are completely worthless. Phenomenal What’s Eating Gilbert Grape analogy.
I thought the whole ‘JerMichael’ naming thing came out of some confusion where the Baby-Mama didn’t know if Jerry was the dad or Michael…so she did the logical uneducated urban American thang and named the baby JerMichael. Makes sense to me.