Source - John Alleman died as he lived. For the last year and a half, Alleman served as the unofficial spokesman for the Heart Attack Grill — the infamous hospital-themed Las Vegas eatery that holds the world record for “most calorific burger.” Last week, Alleman, 54, suffered a massive heart attack and was rushed to Sunrise Hospital in Las Vegas, where he remained on life support until he passed away this morning. According to restaurant owner “Doctor Jon” Basso, Alleman would visit the Heart Attack Grill on a daily basis, and often stood outside for hours trying to convince others to enter.

“I told him if you keep eating like this, it’s going to kill ya,” Basso told the Las Vegas Sun. “He’d say, ‘I just love your place, Jon.’ He’s the only person I know who was probably at the restaurant more than I.” “Patient John” would in time become the restaurant’s mascot, with his caricature on the Grill’s menu, and his own clothing line for sale through the restaurant’s website. “John was a fun spirited man who valued laughter above all else,” the restaurant wrote on its Facebook page. “He was loved deeply and will be missed.” Alleman is the second Heart Attack Grill spokesman to perish in as many years. 29-year-old Blair River passed away in March of 2011. His cause of death was never officially reported, but Basso said then that River succumbed to flu-related pneumonia.


I can already hear them now. The PC police and political pundits grabbing this story and waxing poetic about obesity and cheeseburgers and how fucked up it is that a restaurant that will literally kill you is named after cardiac arrest. But lost in all that is the fact John Alleman was a hero of sorts. A modern day rebel living the dream and doing what he loved. Some people get their rush riding snowboards down mountains or banging Thai hookers that may or may not have penises in Southeast Asia. John Alleman got his kicks eating Triple Bypass Burgers and Flatline Fries every day. Nothing wrong with that. Well I mean physically there’s tons of things wrong with that. That diet will in fact kill you pretty fucking quickly. There was probably a good amount of pain and regret for a few seconds there. But spiritually, the man died in a happy place. We should all be so lucky.

PS – Probably about time for an image overhaul at Heart Attack Grill. You don’t want a name like that to become too literal. Kind of the same principle that explains why Waffle House doesn’t call themselves Get Shot In The Chest And Legs At 3 AM. Probably better to just ignore the death inducing side effects.