Iowa - A dream alignment for numerologists has come true in the delivery room of a Des Moines hospital. The Des Moines Register reports that Laila Fitzgerald weighed 8 pounds, 9 ounces when she was born. She came into the world on Thursday, which, numerically speaking, was 10/11/12. She arrived, militarily speaking, at 1314, which would be 1:14 p.m. for civilians. So the numbers associated with her birth are 8-9-10-11-12-13-14. Laila’s mother, 26-year-old Katie Deremiah, of Des Moines, said she had a feeling Thursday would be the day, even though the due date was Oct. 19. Laila’s father, 26-year-old Ryan Fitzgerald, told The Register that he would buy a lottery ticket as soon as he left the hospital.

Without a doubt one of the worst things in the world is people freaking out over unavoidable number sequences. Like yesterday my Facebook feed blew the fuck up with 10/11/12 posts. People just losing their shit flat out flabbergasted at how that happened.

First off, if that type of stuff amuses you, just get up from your desk right now, walk over to your window, open it up, jump out and kill yourself. 10/11/12 wasn’t “crazy” or “weird” or “unbelievable”. It was “inevitable” and “had to happen because of how our calendar works” you simpletons. Every now and then some number sequences are gonna emerge. Big whoop get over yourself.

And second of all, this family going ballistic over their 8-9-10-11-12-13-14 baby is so full of shit. Your baby wasn’t born at 13:14 you morons. It was born at 1:14. It isn’t a staff sergeant at Fort Hood, it’s a fucking infant, and therefore doesn’t operate on military time. So drop it with the whole fanaticism over your stupid kid and your “I’m gonna go buy a lottery ticket!” speeches. Nobody gives a shit. Your daughter isn’t special and she’s probably going to grow up and severely disappoint you like most daughters do. No fake coincidence is going to change that.