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By Big Cat posted September 16th, 2014 at 1:10 PM

Josh Gordon Did Not Get Another DUI Last Night This Cleveland News Station Just Sucks At Tweeting

      Did Josh Gordon get a DUI last night? Nope, this Cleveland news station just sucks at tweeting. How do I know this? Well unless Josh Gordon hasn’t taken that weird star sweater off since the last time he got arrested with it on in JULY then I’m pretty sure he just pleaded [...]

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Did Josh Gordon get a DUI last night? Nope, this Cleveland news station just sucks at tweeting. How do I know this? Well unless Josh Gordon hasn’t taken that weird star sweater off since the last time he got arrested with it on in JULY then I’m pretty sure he just pleaded guilty today and this isn’t a new charge.

 

 

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Heyyyy, there you go guys. Way to realize that words have actual meanings.

 

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PS

Word on the Barstool street is that Hank retweeted that first tweet and Dave trusted him and may or may not have posted a blog about it. Day 1 internet stuff guys, check Hank’s sources, then re-check them again.

By Big Cat posted September 16th, 2014 at 12:39 PM

Does This Look Like The Face Of A Bengals Fan Arrested For Using Stolen CBS Credentials To Try And Sneak Into The Press Box?

Dude, you're still wearing a jersey.

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(Source) A 46-year-old Newtown man faces charges after Cincinnati police say he tried to use stolen NFL credentials to get into the press box at Paul Brown Stadium during Sunday’s Bengals game. Neil Trotter IV was held without bond overnight at the Hamilton County jail on a charge of receiving stolen property. He was booked in just after 4 p.m. Sunday and was still wearing his Cincinnati Bengals football jersey when his mug shot was taken.

The credentials Trotter allegedly used had been reported stolen from the Bengals administration office earlier in the week. Each credential was valued at $500, according to the arrest report. Trotter is scheduled to face a judge at 9 a.m. Monday. According to court records, Trotter was found with CBS Sports Network credentials, specifically sideline passes.

 

 

Neil, neil, neil. What are you doing man!?! Your plan is good. It actually seems reasonable. Who steals NFL press Credentials? No one, that’s who. And that’s exactly why it works in theory. But then you just had to put on your Giovani Bernard jersey and tip everyone off. Seriously did you ever think that that maybe that was a red flag? A guy walking around with a CBS Sports Network credential and a Bengals jersey? Did you have a hot dog and a beer in your hand as well? Maybe a foam finger and a souvenir cup? Come on dude. If you’re going to be press you get a notebook a suit and one of those old timey hats that reporters used to wear.

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You do that and you’re probably writing columns for CBS right this second. Like Kramer backing his way into a job and eating ritz crackers out of his briefcase.  Instead you let your fandom takeover and that’s why you’re in jail. No one to blame but yourself.

 

 

PS

If you’re this guy why not just tell everyone you’re Uncle Phil? I know he’s dead but you think anyone will stop ghost Uncle Phil from getting into a press box? No chance.

 

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By Big Cat posted September 16th, 2014 at 12:05 PM

Floyd Mayweather Apparently Didn’t Leave A Tip On A $23,000 Bill Over The Weekend Even Though He Made 32 Million On Saturday Night

      (Source) How much is an athlete indebted to tip someone? Should it proportional to the check like every other human being, or should it be proportional to their net worth? These questions have been a point of contention lately following the 20-cent tip that LeSean McCoy left a waiter in Philadelphia last [...]

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(Source) How much is an athlete indebted to tip someone? Should it proportional to the check like every other human being, or should it be proportional to their net worth? These questions have been a point of contention lately following the 20-cent tip that LeSean McCoy left a waiter in Philadelphia last week for what he claimed was poor service.  The latest culprit is Floyd Mayweather Jr., who cleared $32M in his victory over Marcos Maidana over the weekend. Not a bad payday for Mayweather, right? Unfortunately, according to a waitress who served him at Rehab at the Hard Rock in Las Vegas on Sunday, Mayweather wasn’t willing to share the wealth. 

The waitress, named Nik Nyugen, claimed that Mayweather walked into the club with about 150 people, and ordered over $23K in alcohol and food. However, Mayweather didn’t pay a cent. The hotel ended up comping him for the service, and, whether out of ignorance or a lack of empathy, Mayweather decided not to leave Nyugen any sort of tip.  TMZ Sports reports that Nyugen works two jobs, and was dealt a recent personal blow with the death of her father. Meanwhile, Money Mayweather continues to get paid. But should Floyd have left a courtesy tip? Or was he free to walk away since the bottles were comped? Either way, it’s time to set a bar for this sort of thing. 

 

 

 

I’m going to have to side with Floyd Mayweather here. Not saying he’s right to not leave a tip, he definitely is not. But this could not be a more clear case of Floyd Mayweather being an ignorant dummy that doesn’t understand that even when your bill is comped, you should tip your servers for the work they did. Just no chance that ever even dawned on him. This is a guy who can’t read. A guy who when asked about all the times he’s hit a woman said “only god can judge me”, a guy who’s best friend is Justin Bieber. So yeah, I’m giving Floyd a pass on this one. It’s not that he didn’t tip, it’s that he is too dumb to even realize he should have in this situation. He’s like a little kid that doesn’t know better. He didn’t mean to be a dick, he just doesn’t know the difference between right and wrong even though he’s a grown man.

 

 

PS

Just as a sidenote, I can’t fucking stand how every time these stories come out we have to hear about the waiter and how sad and tragic their life is. Get the fuck out of my face with that shit. A lot of people have a lot of shit they deal with, just because you got boned on a tip doesn’t mean you have to beg everyone in America for pity. You should’ve been tipped, yes, but I really don’t care that you work 2 jobs. Sometimes your job sucks, sometimes things don’t go your way, that’s called life.

 

 

h/t nate

By Big Cat posted September 16th, 2014 at 11:17 AM

Barstool Rundown September 15th

By Big Cat posted September 16th, 2014 at 11:05 AM

Rate Scott Van Pelt’s YABO From Last Night

    Great tone, great build up, great annunciation of the Y, I give it a 9.4, the .6 coming off the score because I’m a pussy and went to bed before 11 pm. Also we’re reserving a perfect 10 for when Kris Bryant hits the walk off Home Run to win the 2015 World [...]

 

 

Great tone, great build up, great annunciation of the Y, I give it a 9.4, the .6 coming off the score because I’m a pussy and went to bed before 11 pm. Also we’re reserving a perfect 10 for when Kris Bryant hits the walk off Home Run to win the 2015 World Series.

 

1 Stars2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars6 Stars7 Stars8 Stars9 Stars10 Stars (158 votes, average: 9.68 out of 10)
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5th in the league in home runs? Is that good??? Just kidding I know that’s basically the best ever, in the history of baseball.

 

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By Big Cat posted September 16th, 2014 at 10:30 AM

Can’t Get Classier Than A “Fucking Classy” Chest Tattoo

So classy

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Couldn’t even find a story attached with this mugshot but honestly do you need it? It’s like when you call shotgun before a long road trip or dibs on a girl at the bar. Once it’s said it’s said. Once you get a Fucking Classy tattoo blasted across your chest that’s it, you’re fucking classy. Only illiterates would disagree. Illiterates and people who have no class.

By Big Cat posted September 16th, 2014 at 9:55 AM

Denver Fans Start A Petition To Ban Phil Simms From Calling Their Games Because He Doesn’t Like The Broncos

Fucking cry babies

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(Source) It’s gotten that bad. Denver Broncos fans have dealt with the perceived bias of CBS analyst Phil Simms for years. I’ve always tolerated it – fans often claim an analyst or ref is biased, and being an objective color commentator is difficult when you’re rooting for close games. But now that Denver has Peyton Manning, and the Broncos are ratings juggernauts, CBS has decided to make them their afternoon game featuring their #1 crew of Jim Nantz and Simms virtually every week. It’s all Simms, all the time.

And it’s torture for Broncos fans. It appears Simms is truly unable to call a fair, unbiased game when the Broncos play. Virtually every penalty or near-penalty or close call under review in Sunday’s Chiefs victory provided Simms a soapbox to argue in Kansas City’s favor. Even when the refs reviewed a call in Denver’s favor, Simms still disagreed. It came off whiny and, yes, biased. The words, “I don’t mean to root against Denver, but…” even came out of his mouth. When you have to justify your next sentence with that type of disclaimer… you’re rooting against Denver. “The People of Denver” have spoken and started a petition on Change.org to have Simms banned from Broncos games. It received nearly 100 signatures in its first five minutes. As of Monday morning, the petition has over 3,000 signatures. Their goal is 5,000 signatures.

Petition by

The People Of Denver

We do not know why he is assigned to the Broncos games every year. It is sure and complete torture for Bronco Fans to have to listen to his biased drivel every week. Please sign this petition so our voice can be heard. We are tired of Phil Simms in Denver!

 

 

 

Holy shit are Broncos fans a bunch of whiny pussies for this. Wahhh, Phil Simms doesn’t like us. Wahhh, we just want someone to call the game in a fair manner. Get the fuck over yourselves. 2 things you completely miss here are 1) If Phill Simms is calling your game that means your team is good. He’s the number 1 AFC/CBS pairing, he doesn’t go around announcing nobodies. You got gifted a Hall of Fame quarterback and basically rebuilt your franchise over night to a point where every Sunday you have the biggest game on the slate. Shut the fuck up when someone doesn’t like you. This would be like me complaining if Joe Buck called a Cubs playoff game because he’s a Cardinals fan. See how dumb that is? See how that’s totally missing the point? Be happy you’re good and in the spotlight. And 2) Do you not understand how hate works? If someone hates you that means you own them. That means they are thinking about you all the time. That means the thought of you consumes them. I hate Schefty, you think Schefty knows who the fuck I am? Of course not. So even though I can’t stand him, he’s technically winning our little made up war. Just like if you keep your mouth shut and let Phill Simms hate you then you’ve officially won. Phil Simms can’t do anything about it. He has to work Broncos games. Meanwhile you threw on your hater blockers and ride high around time. It’s like you’ve never been hated before Denver, fucking morons.

 

 

By Big Cat posted September 16th, 2014 at 9:25 AM
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