(Source) John Boyett, now a former member of the Broncos’ practice squad, was arrested early Wednesday in Greenwood Village after police say he drunkenly head-butted and punched a cab driver, stole a shovel from a construction site then tried to hide from officers by covering himself in mulch, court records show. Boyett, 24, told arresting officers to “contact his boss John Elway” before repeatedly slamming his head into a patrol car window while yelling and spitting, records say.
Boyett, a safety, was released by the Broncos on Thursday, the team said. This week’s arrest was Boyett’s second run-in with the law in 13 months. He had made the Indianapolis Colts’ season-opening roster as a sixth-round rookie last season before he was arrested on charges of disorderly public intoxication and resisting arrest after an altercation with police in September 2013. Boyett competed for a spot on the Broncos’ 53-man roster during training camp but was waived after the team’s final preseason game. He was re-signed to their practice squad Aug. 31.
The Broncos told The Denver Post they were “disappointed” to learn of his arrest and behavior. Before his arrest, Boyett had been drinking at the Sports Book Bar & Grill, where a bartender and patrons said he was highly intoxicated and making threats, police say.Police said Boyett tried to take food off another patron’s plate and was asked to leave when he became agitated, threatening to punch a bartender and refusing to pay his tab. Two police officers responded and called Boyett a cab. About five minutes later, the driver called authorities to report he had been assaulted by Boyett on the 9700 block of East Arapahoe Road, records say.
Lot of things going on here. Quite the night for John Boyett. So let’s take a look at it piece by piece.
1. Getting Drunk at the Bar to the point of black out – Good move. If you don’t think this is a good move then you’re either a pussy or a recovering alcoholic, both of which are not acceptable answers.
2. Trying to eat off other people’s plates - Bad Move, but, you can’t say you’ve never wanted to do it. It’s like the “every time you see a cop’s gun” thing I talked about a few weeks ago. Your inner urge is to grab it even though you wouldn’t in a million years. You see something delicious on a person’s plate and there is that little 4 year old in the back of your brain that’s just like do it, grab it and stuff it in your face. I understand this.
3. Head Butt a cab driver – I’m in the middle on this one. Cab drivers fucking suck. I won’t say they should be harmed but for the most part I hate all of them. I can see how this could happen.
Just as an aside on this one. Have people noticed Uber drivers wanting to talk wayyyyy more now? It’s like they think carrying on a pointless conversation will increase their rating. So fucking annoying. You talk on your cell phone with your cousins in Arabia, I’ll sit in the back on my phone and try not to die. It’s pretty fucking simple.
4. Grabbing a shovel and covering yourself in mulch to hide from the police - This is an A+ move. Have you ever seen Predator? Dutch Schaefer? If you want to hide from the police or a murderous alien you have to cover yourself in dirt/mulch. Infrared. Ever heard of it? Guys like Rovell were saying “oh my god, can you believe he did this???” last night. Yeah, I can, if you’re hiding from the cops you bury yourself, don’t be stupid.
5. Name dropping John Elway - Now normally I’m not a fan of the name drop. Pretty good indication you’re a douchebag if you do this. But under these circumstances I have to say, it plays. I can’t even imagine what it must be like to name drop John Elway in the city of Denver. Is there a higher name drop one can give? I don’t even think saying you know the Pope or the President is as meaningful as John Elway in Denver. So when you have the opportunity to do this you do it. You’re essentially saying, I’m friends with God, let me know if you want to talk to him first. Actually now that I’m typing this, how the fuck did this guy even get arrested?